


Drift Away

by sunflowerjared



Category: Be More Chill
Genre: Angst, but theyre scared of deactivation, have fun I guess, i cried, i kind of finished this quickly bc uh, i was going thru it but, it’s like a mixed au, ly gets abandoned, riverway spinel au, squipscord made me do it, this was based off of a spinel au, where jeremy & michael made a server for them to live in, yeah i was in a mood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2020-11-02 10:49:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20720012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunflowerjared/pseuds/sunflowerjared
Summary: River wouldn’t leave Lyceum forever.Would he?





	Drift Away

“Lyceum, being here is incredibly dangerous for us. Squip Inc. _still_ has tabs kept on every SQUIP released. If they find out we’re on a completely different plane, they’ll _deactivate_ us.”

Lyceum looked right into River’s eyes, searching the deep brown iris’s for some sort of clue as to which emotion he was feeling. But with those sort of human traits being relatively new to them, both still had trouble communicating with body language when it came down to it.

“I know, but… It’d be dangerous.” Lyceum brought their hands up, gently grasping onto River’s shoulders.

“Yes, but if we want to be together like this, then I have to try to take down the one thing that could intercept.”

Lyceum let out a sigh, their head tilting down to stare at the ground as they thought it over. River was right. Them being together in a made up server was possibly more dangerous than River going off to battle the bigger monsters.

“Okay… Okay, you’re right.” They lifted their head back up, making eye contact with the other once again. “You’re always right.”

River offered a smug smirk, “I know I am.”

The couple chuckled, shared one last kiss, then River backed away.

He gave a wave as he dissipated into the air with a mosaic of pixels, leaving Lyceum standing there, teary eyed and alone.

So alone.

—

Time passed. Seconds. Minutes. Weeks. Months. _Years_. River had yet to return.

Of course Lyceum knew this mission was important. It meant their future. The one they had planned out. Not carefully, or getting too deep into detail, but planned enough to know where they were vaguely going with everything. They were going to stay in their server, create their world however they wanted, still maintain contact with Jeremy, and it was going to be their happily ever after.

Or at least, that’s what Lyceum thought.

They stayed right where River had left them. Never leaving or venturing out back into Jeremy’s world, too scared that their boyfriend would come back while he wasn’t around. They had to stay. They couldn’t leave. River was going to come back _eventually_.

... Right?

Some days they paced anxiously, wondering if something had happened to River. Had he gotten deactivated? Did SQUIP Inc. find a way to factory reset him? There was no telling, and Lyceum didn’t have the courage to follow, afraid of what they might come face to face with had they wandered off into that territory.

When River was there, they had a house already manifested. Nothing too big or small, or too outdated or advanced. It was something that was perfectly in between and modern, yet also mimicked their personalities and robotic tendencies very well. The outside world was just as beautiful. A lush garden filled with a mix of fruits and vegetables and flowers in the backyard faded out into a vast field of golden grass that glowed in the sunlight. Bees and ladybugs buzzed all around, and at night lightning bugs would fill the air like a bunch of tiny, up close stars. There was wildlife, too, but they let them be. There was no need to interfere. It was just there to make things feel more normal. They new deep down, it was technically all a hologram. A bunch of pixels meshed together to create the illusion of a perfect world. But they were happy. So happy. Lyceum didn’t dare touch a thing while River was gone. They didn’t want to risk him coming back to too much change.

At one point, they managed to find a way to even randomize the weather so it would change from day to day.

It rained almost every single day since River left.

Lyceum experienced sadness before. Multiple times. But nothing this deep. Nothing this _long_. Nothing that had incapacitated them to the point where there were some days he couldn’t even pull themselves out of bed. Routine became monotonous and boring. They couldnt help but wonder if it would be the same had River been there. Probably not.

Another rainy day came, and Lyceum had finally managed to scrape the bottom of the barrell for the very last bit of hope and motivation. They looked at themselves in a mirror. Their hair was a little awry. Their mismatched eyes were dark and cold, almost lifeless. They lost their glint to them long ago.

With a sigh, they turned away as they rubbed a hand down their face, deciding to make their way to the kitchen. They didn’t need to eat, of course, but they got some sort of satisfaction out of it. Plus, food just tasted good. Jeremy was right, it really was a good way to comfort yourself.

Right before they had reached the threshold that seperated their living room and kitchen, there was a sound that was almost akin to some sort of metal windchime descending in tone. Their first thought was River, but as they quickly turned on their heel to face the sound, they were instead met with a different Squip who was just then finished with manifesting. It was tall, hid behind a dark cloak and sunglasses along with black hair to match. They looked like they were something straight of the Matrix.

Lyceum’s heart immediately dropped to their stomach.

No. _Nononononononono_.

“Lyceum?” The Squip spoke, and even though their eyes were hidden behind a thick tint, Lyceum could feel the stare they had on them.

“Uh... Yeah?”

“My name’s Vi. I’ve come to tell you that River has been assigned to a new host and will no longer be returning here. However, you will be safe and Squip Inc. will have no interference with your life.”

Lyceum froze. They couldn’t feel anything. It was like someone had tied them down with a thousand cinderblocks and threw him into the ocean. They couldn’t even find the words to say. They were speechless.

Vi didn’t say anything else. Just dissipated into that same world of pixels that they manifested from, going off to wherever it was that they had come from, leaving Lyceum alone.

So alone.

Alone.  
_ Alone_.  
**_ Alone_**.

That happily ever after was thrown away in half a second. Those moments spent loosely planning, moments spent together, laughing, hugging, crying. It was gone. Done for. No more memories to be made. Whatever was in the past was in the past.

River gave it all up. And for what? _A new host?_

He left the supposed love of his life for a useless, nobody host. Left the promise of an infinite life with anything he could have ever wanted. And it raised pure, unadulterated rage inside of Lyceum. They felt betrayed, hurt, upset, anything possible that one could feel towards someone who absolutely shattered their heart. There were promises that River made. So many. They were all broken, thrown down the drain, forgotten about. Lyceum suddenly didn’t matter. Did River plan this all along? Planned to leave because he had gotten tired of them? Told them to stay still and not follow so he could just leave and Lyceum wouldn’t be able to find him again?

They had been lied to. All the love and time they put in, and they gave a lot. They gave their all. Everything. Absolutely everything. Because River deserved it. And now they regretted it. Every minute. Every second they spent. Gone.

All _gone_.

Lyceum felt like they were standing there for hours before they were finally able to gain their mobility back. However, that just made their shaky knees buckle under them and cause them to fall to the floor, hunching over in on themselves, arms wrapped tightly around their middle. Their entire body was shaking like a leaf as their broken sobs racked their chest. They curled enough in themselves to rest their forehead on their knees, squeezing their eyes shut and the tears immediately falling from there onto his jeans. Anger boiled up from the pit of their stomach, rising up until it hit a peak. It was almost overwhelming with how strong that feeling was. Of course they had experienced anger before, but nothing this bad. They wanted nothing more than to scream their lungs out.

So they did.

Lyceum’s hands came up to grip at his hair, tugging on it tightly and letting out the most blood curdling, horrifying scream that echoed off the white walls. They couldn’t _take_ it. They _couldn’t. _

So much time  _wasted_ .

So many promises  _broken_ .

So many happily ever after’s  _ruined_ . 

But they had always been so happy to  _listen_ .

Happy to  _stay_ .

Happily watching him  _ drift away . _


End file.
